Strong Badass Seniors in Popular Culture
"It's not the years, honey. It's the mileage." - Indiana Jones, Raiders of the Lost Ark
"Fossil", "geezer", "fogey", "spinster", "old-timer", "boomer"...all disparaging nicknames for the elderly. Throughout history, seniors have been ridiculed, mocked, or viewed as unwanted "burdens" on society, which I find extremely sad and unfair. After all, nobody can control their age, any more than anyone can control the colour of their skin, or the country in which they were born. Given that October 1 was National Seniors Day in Canada, I thought I'd explore some cool examples of strong badass seniors in popular culture. I dedicate this post to all the cool seniors in my family, including all those who are sadly no longer with us. Let's begin...
Slappy Squirrel, Animaniacs
First on our list is everybody's favourite bushy-tailed, curmudgeonly rodent, Slappy Squirrel. In-universe, Slappy was a real star back in her day, having starred in the Slappy, The Slap-Happy Squirrel cartoons during the Golden age of American animation. However, in the 1990s setting of Animaniacs, she's become a short-tempered, acid-tongued senior, embarking on all sorts of hilarious misadventures with her grand-nephew, Skippy. Don't expect Slappy to squeeze the cheeks of children, knit, or play bingo, as doing so will likely get you slapped by her. If the Looney Tunes gang had aged since their inception in 1933, chances are they'd have gradually developed similar personalities and outlooks on life as Slappy.
Scrooge McDuck, DuckTales
Next up is the epitome of the American rags to riches story, Scrooge McDuck, who was born into an impoverished Scottish family in 1867, before seeking his fortune in the world during the late 19th and early 20th centuries. By the time of his first adventure with Donald, Huey, Dewey, and Louie in 1947, the miserly octogenarian had amassed a vast financial empire. Being an incredibly wealthy and extremely greedy capitalist with a heart of 24-karat gold, Uncle Scrooge may not be the most relatable senior on this list, but his comic book adventures are quite epic, and there's much humor to be found in his miserly meanness. When DuckTales debuted in 1987, the cartoon softened Uncle Scrooge's personality, making him kinder and gentler, much to the chagrin of comic book writer, Don Rosa. Uncle Scrooge also starred in a few classic video games by Capcom.
Impa, The Legend of Zelda
Back in ye olden days of old school video games, players had to read instruction manuals for exposition. This is important to note, as while our next senior, Princess Zelda's elderly nursemaid, Impa, didn't physically appear in the original two The Legend of Zelda video games, she nonetheless played a pivotal role in the plots of both. As per the storylines fleshed out in the manuals, Impa first sought out Link after Princess Zelda's abduction by Ganon, sending the courageous young hero on his journey to restore peace to Hyrule. Then, a few years later, she informed Link of the true nature of the mysterious Triforce symbol that suddenly appeared on the teenager's hand, imparting on him the tragedy of the first Hyrulian princess to bear the name, "Zelda". Arming the lad with the tools and know-how to break this Zelda's sleeping spell, Impa once again set into motion Link's heroic second quest.
Sumo Santa, Clayfighter 63 1/3
Santa Claus is arguably the world's most famous senior. After all, what's not to love about a jovial, big-bellied milk and cookie addict who gives away free stuff on Christmas Eve? Who could possibly be cooler than Santa? Sumo Santa, of course! Firstly, Sumo Santa is a combatant in a parody of the fighting game genre. How cool is that? Secondly, he and his fellow brawlers, are all clay figurines lovingly brought to life via the laborious magic of stop-motion animation. As such, Sumo Santa harkens back to all those iconic Rankin/Bass Christmas specials of the 1960s. Thirdly, not only is this senior spry, agile, well-versed in the martial arts, and a master belly launcher, but Sumo Santa is also body confident enough to rock nothing but a loincloth. Sumo Santa is the complete package, and instead of dishing out free stuff, he dishes out pain to his competition. Don't let the familiar white beard or jelly belly fool you; it's wise to stay off Sumo Santa's naughty list...
Emma "Granny" Webster, Looney Tunes
On the surface, Emma Webster, better known as "Granny", is just your (stereo)typical sweet old lady; a good-natured senior, always smiling and giggling, living happily with her three pets; Tweety Bird, Sylvester the Cat, and Hector the Bulldog, all of whom she loves dearly. However, as Sylvester constantly learns, yet frequently forgets, it's most unwise to mistake Granny's pleasant demeanor for naivety or weakness, as she has a short-fuse and fiery temper, especially whenever her darling little Tweety comes under threat by, "dat bad ol' putty tat". Indeed, you wouldn't like Granny or her broom, purse, umbrella, and anything else within arm's reach, when she's angry. Of further note, Granny is also a gifted detective, in the same vein as fellow senior investigators, Jane Marple and Jessica Fletcher.
King Triton, The Little Mermaid
Anyone who foolishly believes all seniors are meek, brittle, defenseless, or weak have clearly never met the intimidating ruler of the seas, King Triton, whose flowing white beard belies his Herculean physique. Triton must hit the gym regularly, as the guy is jacked. Seriously, Triton has the build of a WWE wrestler or a Masters of the Universe character. I guess performing the butterfly stroke all day long must really pay off? Anyway, given that Triton's also extremely short-tempered, a major misanthrope, and overly protective of his seven daughters, Eric sure is lucky that Ariel didn't stick to her original plan of swimming up to his castle the night she rescued him. Otherwise, Eric would've most likely been the one shattered into a million tiny shards, rather than his statue...
I hope you all enjoyed this post. I'll likely do a follow-up at some point, as I have plenty more examples I can cover. Do you have any thoughts on this post? If so, feel free to reach out by leaving a comment, dropping me a line, or signing my guestbook to share your opinions on this or any other topic. Also, feel free to press the "like" button if you enjoyed this post, as "likes" help me gauge audience interest in the content I post. After all, I don't want to bore anyone, ha-ha. Until next time, love, peace, and chicken grease!
Posted in "Nerd Alert" on Thursday, October 3, 2024.