BC Bound: My Autistic Perspective on Flying to the West Coast, Crossing Time Zones, and Attending a Relative's Wedding
Lost in Vancouver... in a good way.
"♪ It's a nice day to start again! It's a nice day for a white wedding! It's a nice day to start again! ♫" - Billy Idol, White Wedding
Please pardon my lack of new content and GIFs over the past week, but I was in BC with my parents, attending my younger cousin's wedding and meeting up with my aunt, uncle, and some family friends who live on the West Coast. In the weeks leading up to our trip, the prospect of travelling so far from home to attend a crowded and noisy event filled me with dread, as I tend to suffer immense autism-related anxieties when placed in such scenarios. Still, I wanted to be there for my cousin, her hubby, and my aunt and uncle, so I made sure to bring along my Switch, 3DS, tablet, and earbuds, which have always been helpful in alleviating my stress levels. I also mentally prepared myself for uncomfortable situations, such as the flights, jetlag, hotel beds, and overstimulation at the wedding. Armed with these tools, I pushed onwards to the West Coast. What follows are my autistic perspectives on my time in BC, both the highs and lows, and some of the coping mechanisms I found helpful. I'll be numbering these topics.
First up, were the connecting flights to BC, which I knew would be difficult due to the miserly nature of modern airlines, along with the change in air pressure, cramped seats that clearly weren't designed to accommodate tall folks like me, and the long airport waits between flights. To lessen these blows, I made sure to chew gum during takeoffs and landings, played some video games, and booked window seats on each of our flights, as I always feel safest when seated against walls or windows. While there was nothing I could do to avoid the pain in my knees from being crammed into such tight spaces, I was at least able to distract myself from the physical discomfort by gazing down at the clouds, farm fields, and mountains below.
Second up, were the sleeping issues I was forced to contend with. There were the unpleasant symptoms of jetlag from crossing multiple time zones, such as dizziness, fatigue, and nausea. There were also the discomforts of sleep deprivation and lower-back pain I experienced from lying on an uncomfortable hotel pull-out sofa bed. In both scenarios, I found Gravol somewhat helpful, as it lessens the queasiness while also leading to drowsiness. It wasn't a perfect solution, however, and I rarely got more than a few hours of sleep a night. Ironically, our hotel was called, "Sandman," though he never arrived to give me a dream.
Third up, was the first of our three BC reunions, in this case, some dear family friends and former neighbours who invited us over to their home in the mountains for a delicious home-cooked meal. Their patio overlooked a breathtaking, snowcapped mountain just across the US border in Washington. There are no words to describe how magnificent it was witnessing the sunset from this altitude, which brought back fond youthful memories of life in South America for my Mom. Truly magical. Even better, though, was the company of such awesome people. My parents and I are truly blessed to have such good friends all over the country and world. It honestly felt as though no time had passed since we lived across the street from these good people. God bless them.
Fourth up, the primary reason for our, "Journey to the West," was my younger cousin's wedding, which was held on a secluded lakeside venue nestled amongst the evergreens and mountains of forested BC. Again, a beautiful landscape straight out of a Group of Seven painting (or an episode of 1985's The Raccoons). It's so easy to understand why countless folks are permanently drawn to the West Coast. While I knew the wedding would be the ultimate test of endurance for my stress metre, I wanted to push through my anxieties to be there for my cousin, her hubby, and my aunt and uncle. Fortunately, all four of them were long aware of my autism and associated social anxieties, so they understood that my psychological discomfort was nothing personal, nor a negative statement on their magic moment in the majestic mountains.
While I noted this natural setting would've provided an ideal quiet space for me to escape to when I'd inevitably become overwhelmed by sensory overload, it was a rainy day, which kept both the wedding ceremony and reception indoors. While I did my best to find quiet corners of the venue to regain my composure, I was constantly being asked to move by DJs, wedding planners, caterers, and photographers. As a result, I was forced to regulate my anxieties solely through the aid of my Switch and earbuds. I also tried to distract myself by focusing on the beautiful ceremony and delicious food.
My cousin and her hubby assigned seats via shot glasses with name tags clipped to them. They also took the time to write personalized "thank you" notes for each of their guests, which was a touching gesture. There was an open bar at the wedding, though I only asked for a glass of Coke (no rum or lime, haha). Instead of wedding cake, there was ice cream, which was...uh, interesting. While we didn't know many people there, as most of the guests were friends of my cousin or her hubby, one of the bridesmaids/the emcee, whom my parents and I had met several years ago, came over to say "hi" to us, which was nice of her. As emcee, she delivered instructions via a humorous parody of a flight attendant's spiel, which was cool.
We enjoyed ourselves on that special day but ultimately had to leave the wedding a few hours early; driving through the woods at night would've been a nerve-wracking prospect. I'd also exhausted the lengths of my anxiety threshold, as the large crowd of revelers coupled with the deafeningly loud music had become too overwhelming for me to endure any longer. Despite slipping out early, we nonetheless had a wonderful time at my cousin's wedding. While it's too bad we couldn't stay to the end, I'm relieved we got back to the hotel before nightfall and am proud of myself for lasting as long as I did.
Fifth up, was the second of our three BC reunions, in this case, spending some private, family time with my aunt and uncle, following a post-wedding brunch for all the wedding guests at a golf course, which is where the newlyweds departed for their honeymoon (and where I suffered severe sunburn on my arms). With all the attendees now headed home, my aunt and uncle decided to spend a night at our hotel, where the five of us caught up on old times, sharing family anecdotes and laughs over all-day breakfasts at Denny's, where we received 25% discounts from our waitress, Parul, in exchange for writing her five-star Google reviews, praising her exceptional service. Even though our family reunion was too short, it was also very sweet. Again, God bless them.
Sixth up, was concluding our West Coast trip by spending a day in Vancouver, followed by the last of our three BC reunions, in this case, one of my Dad's closest childhood friends. Upon arriving in the outskirts of Vancouver, we rode the SkyTrain across the city to Gastown, where we were headed to visit the famous Steam Clock. Despite my general discomfort in crowded environments, I felt totally comfortable and relaxed aboard the SkyTrain and in front of the Steam Clock. I suspect this is due to my big city roots, as I once relied on public transit to get around Toronto. I enjoyed the views of Vancouver from the SkyTrain and loved the Steam Clock. It's so cute and charming, toot-tooting the Westminster Quarters with little puffs of steam. I just had to purchase a souvenir fridge magnet depicting such a cool timepiece.
As mentioned, we also managed to squeeze in one more reunion before heading home, as my Dad's buddy and his wife lived just a short walk from one of the SkyTrain stations. It was lovely paying them a visit. Again, once the two childhood pals were reunited, it felt as though no time had passed. It was super nice of them to drive us around and treat us to a delicious dinner at a Mongolian restaurant, Mongo Bongo (what a cool name for a restaurant). This final reunion was a wonderful way to end our family holiday. Once more, God bless them.
Last up, were the connecting flights back home, which were much worse on my poor knees due to an obnoxious woman sitting in front of me, who insisted on repeatedly reclining her seat into my lap, as though it would somehow magically recline further into my already cramped personal space. It took every ounce of willpower for me to resist the urge to kick the back of her seat, full force. As it turned out, I wasn't the only autistic person having a rough time on that plane, though, as my Mom pointed out to me a young girl stimming on the opposite side of the plane from us. She was seated next to a guy with a nasty cough, who refused to put on a facemask or cover his mouth, so I could sense that poor autistic girl's distress and felt her pain. I really hope she didn't contract the plague from that guy.
And that about wraps up the recap of our West Coast trip. While it was fun to attend my younger cousin's wedding, see the mountains of BC and Washington, reunite with beloved family and friends, and spend a day in Vancouver, to quote Dorothy Gale, "There's no place like home!" I'm so glad to be back home, sleeping in my own bed again...which isn't a hotel pull-out sofa bed. Now, I just need to readjust to the reverse-jetlag, haha. Thanks so much for reading! Do you have any thoughts on this post? If so, feel free to reach out by leaving a comment, dropping me a line, or signing my guestbook to share your opinions on this or any other topic. Also, feel free to press the "like" button if you enjoyed this post, as "likes" help me gauge audience interest in the content I post. After all, I don't want to bore anyone, ha-ha. Until next time, love, peace, and chicken grease!
Posted in "Autistic Perspectives" on Friday, June 6, 2025.